Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Obsession or Single-Minded Determination?

I flip through the pages of the paper and catch a glimpse at Obsession.

There's the boy who created 20,000 flash cards to prepare for the National Spelling Bee. I'm not sure I even know 20,000 words, let alone how to spell them. I was a finalist in the grammar school spelling bee, but my nerves caused me to flub such an easy word that I know I would crack under pressure way before I got to Laodicean.*

I read about Celine Dion and her crusade to have babies with her geriatric husband. That woman has devoted her life to bad music and Rene. I guess I should have seen it coming when she had her wedding veil stitched to her scalp. Nothing was going to stop her beautiful day or her beautiful life. Not a bleeding scalp or nature.

But part of me is jealous. I don't know if I've ever felt that passionate about anything. Is it obsession or single-minded determination? Is there even a difference? Perhaps if I collected 20,000 sentences I would have the book I'm supposed to be writing. Perhaps if I believed in myself as much as Celine believes in her destiny as a Mother I would be published.

It's easy to mock from the sidelines. But maybe, just for today, I'll relish in their resolution.

* 2009 Spelling Bee Winning Word

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